Hazel Has been Naughty

The best part about exchanging avatar passwords with your SL® Business partner is getting on their avatar, dressing them up as a sex kitten and then photoshopping them in a seedy place. See below.

Hazel Kyrgyz: XXX Life

Also, why do people make their alternative avatars look just like their regular avatar? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of having an "alt"... so if you have 3 avatars that look the same, is the 3rd called an "alt's alt" ... and What happens if you created 100 avatars and had them all look the same...and then had 100 computers and logged on with all those alts...would that totally creep people the fuck out? I think it would people, I think it would.

"I'm Starting With the Man in the Mirror..."

Happy David B-Day! bahaha

So despite the ghettoness of running anything on my craptop, I decided to make a collage for Hazel! She sent me the AWESOMEST care package for my (David) B-day!

And the items were WRAPPED IN THE ECONOMIST!!! BAHAHAHA. Anyway... I feel it is appropriate to post the collage and this shout out :)

When your computer implodes during your birthday week... and stuff is sucking, nothing is happier than TOM HANKS! and turkish delight mmmmm...

Computers suck

I hate my computer and I want it to stop being so fucked up and for it to work! Due to power outageness and the fact my BIOS battery is dead... my computer is currently out of commission. Yes... it will not recognize the monitor or the keyboard....thus.. it is rendered useless.

On the bright side.. YAY for Second Life ®friends. My buddy offered his computer genius services, while Hazel Kyrgyz offered her support ("Live Computer Live") for this situation.

However after 2 hours ofservices, and Ms. Kyrgyz's happy thoughts... the computer is still ..fucked up.

I really hope I am not condemned to my laptop to play SecondLife ®... because this laptop, while being very useful for recreational websurfing .. is not equipped for SL.

I'm now going to go burrow myself away under the covers until this is over and my friend's husband agrees to assisting me in my mess of a situation.

I'm so Haute right now

You know what has been bothering me more than the outrageous prices for clothes in world these days? The absolute misuse of the term haute couture by Second Life Designers. Apparently haute couture has become the age old excuse for charging 400+ L per dress... without living up to the standards of the actual haute couture houses. Last I checked, haute couture did not mean "rip off prices." No... let's take a step back via Wikipedia.com...

In modern France, "haute couture is a 'protected name' that can be used only by firms that meet certain well-defined standards. However, the term is also used loosely to describe all high-fashion custom-fitted clothing."* As one who lived in Paris over the summer, the truth about haute couture houses is they are elite! We are talking small boutiques filled with unique dresses tailored to the clientele... and I swear I saw on customer being served cafe au lait in the one in Rome. Anyway... this is NOT what Second Life® designers live up to as a standard. Those designers who dare use the term haute couture have mall sized shops and sell dresses to the masses---they have turned their businesses into a Walmart of Clothes, albeit higher prices and haute couture stamped on the side.

Just because you say your items are haute couture ...does not mean they are... or that you even have the legitimacy in using such terms when describing your product. In Paris apparently the term haute couture is protected by law, to be considered with such a term a designer's house must meet certain qualifications--i.e. objective standards---before being able to associate themselves with the term.

Additionally, because haute couture is prided on its individual unique designs...if a house has too much commercialization and "ready-to-wear" items, it can lose its status as a haute couture house. If applied in-world... perhaps the better term for these SL haute couture knock-offs would be ... Resident Shopping Malls for the masses. Overpriced, but accessible to all.

It's ok, I don't shame you SL®"haute couture" designers for attempting to be what you aren't, but realize you are misusing the word and move on...because those of you have started the trend have created a plague. Whereby anyone with a looprezzer, photoshop/gimp and computer is considering themselves a haute couture designer. Well... Christian Doir would be ashamed!

* Haute couture, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haute_couture

Because this is a necessary test if you Game...

I have nothing of interest to report.. although the fact I have a Second Life Blog for my avatar should make me more than "Slightly Dorky"...you'd think?

Turning Into Your Avi

Have you ever gotten dressed for the day, done your hair, unwrinkled your clothes...and then looked in the mirror and said to yourself, "SHIT..I look like my avi."

Whether it's the makeshift hairstyle you did or the outfit you bought at the store because it looked "cool"...I think we all end up looking like our avi. Now the question remains, are we looking like our avis...or our are avis looking like us? This is a perplexing question when considering that some RL people have avis of different genders and/or different species. Thus, when you are looking at tiger costumes (or another gender's clothes) ...do these people want to wear that shit in RL too?

This is probably one of the reasons the whole "furry" culture has creeped me the fuck out. (and still does). Like every other American I learned about this subculture through nothing else but... television, C.S.I. nonetheless. In this episode the furries (i.e. people in costumes) were "doing it" in like fur piles. Fur piles of people in costumes... not so hot right now. And rather disturbing.

After watching such an episode [and ofcourse EVERYTHING on TV (esp. C.S.I.) is true] I came to a rather disturbed conclusion about furries... they all dress up in costumes and go at it like rabbits (excuse the pun).

But is this truly who SL ® furries are as they RPG on SL®? Are they RL furpilin' sex fiends?

While I turn more and more into my avatar (or vice versa) ...are these SL® furries secretly developing tails and ear and fur fetishes in RL (or vice versa)? Maybe this is something I never want to know the answer to... especially as a recent friend of mine on SL turned ..FURRY *gasp*

I think ultimately we don't want to think that the furry chick we know on SL ®who looks like this:


Really looks like THIS:

MOM is WOW upside down!

A few months ago my mom and I were on a bit of a roadtrip for 15 hours...alone...with mom. As such you can imagine the insanity of being stuck in car with your mother for that long brings. I grasped for topics to talk about; I can talk for days, but after a few hours your throat gets dry and so does your wit... Anyway, Second Life came up. I went into all the sordid details of the metaverse known as Second Life. From furries, to sex shops, to men being women (hey, it's my mom!) Well I didn't tell her ALL the sordid details, or really ANY... I think I mostly stuck to how I DJ in world, ride elephants and make dresses. Somehow this conversation struck a chord with her...and in my midst of trying to pass the time in the claustrophobic car.. the world ended. All it took were the words uttered by my mother.."Wow, I'd like to try Second Life." The look of horror on my face was only comparable to that of a 13 year old realizing mom and dad are chaperoning the 8th grade dance... or various other teenage angsty horror stories. On the upside...my mom was only half serious. Apparently she is going to hold off the grid, and the possibility of "chilling with my avatar homeys" until her retirement, years from now. But the thought of my MOTHER joining my sacred world of the grid, somehow horrified me... and this made me think of how we all would breach this subject with an interested parent.

I mean, a lot of people who I am friends with on SecondLife® are old enough to be my mom or dad.. So why this big of a deal?

I'll tell you, it's the thought of this:

"Average" Mom* by Day:


"Average" Mom by NIGHT:


And that thought...keeps me thoroughly creepified enough to hope my mom never joins Second Life.

Oh, btw, I dedicate this entry to a close Second Life friend of mine, whose mother just joined Second Life. Godspeed friend, godspeed.


*note: not my mom, some random google image I found when searching "mom"..although she looks reallll cool. heh.

The Crash Screen of DEATH

Every avatar has seen this screen...and as you get older and wiser in the ways of Ye Olde Secondlife®...you can feel it coming. The crash screen of DEATH. It usually starts out as a bit of lag, your avatar moves like the Million Dollar Man...sllooowlllyy.. and then... you're trying to type and you just keep typing, but nothing is said in chat. Then...boom. SL® is out of sight and the blurby box pops up in your OS saying "You've just crashed, sucks to be you... you might even have to uninstall SL and reinstall again, suckaaaa."

It is at those times you feel like you are the puppet of some prank...and worse is when by the TIME you get back on you are only to be flooded with ims from all your friends (who were online when you crashed) saying that they've left. So, you've crashed and now you're alone...and have no reason to be on SL® at 4 a.m.

Don't you just hate that shit?

And since it's 4 am...let's ponder this? Does anyone else thing Philip (Rosedale) Linden is mildly attractive in the "dorky 30 something (who is filthy rich) wishin' he was a frat boy" sorta way? Or is it just me?

Poverty Stricken Avatar Seeks $Lindens$

The trouble with using SL®®® as a form of entertainment is that ultimately it does cost money. And to spend money in world you need to either make money in RL or in SL®. As I currently do not have a job in RL (see: poor law student phenomena), I depend on my SL income to meet my prim demands. My shopping addiction in SL is never ending..storrryyy. Be it hair, skin, shoes, tattoos, or flying elephants...I WANT IT ALL. As such, I turned to the secondlife classifieds in search of employment needs... I found none.

However, will someone explain to me why there are so many crappy DJs that are employed? And why do people listen to them? And...why do people use that fucking "fuego" gesture and GESTURES in general. While the two latter points lead to another issue entirely, that of people being fucking douches in RL and SL...the first part does pique me. If a DJ has a monotone voice, no rapport with the audience and generally plays sucky music....why are they employed on SL? Better yet, why do people flock to their venues? Is it that people have no taste in music? Or is it that most SLers are about 37 years old, and have somehow, in the years leading up to that age, totally forgotten what REAL music sounds like? I understand they grew up in the 1980s where Bobby Brown was like Elvis and The Scorpions were melodic rock...but C'MON! When a DJ is so bad that you stop going to your old hangout to meet up with your friends because DJ "Suck-a-Lot" will be streaming.... something has got to give!

And in case I am unable to get tips from my DJing ..(probably)... I shall offer myself up as...a free Kitten?


I'll at least have to live in that cardboard box... it's low prim right?

New Store Rant

Firstly: Look it's Hazel and I in the new store! Finally, things come together!


One thing they don't tell you in the "Girls Who Want to Become SL® Fashion Designers" handbook is that image is everything! I think it's even more true in Second Life. While in real life we see the most beautiful people...in magazines, tv, movies etc... in Second Life EVERYONE is beautiful. Thus, if your avatar has fecked up thighs or non-prim hair..we notice. And, we also notice in the way stores are set up! The most well known, designer stores of SecondLife® seem to have the nicest stores! I can't imagine what they pay to have rl/SL® contractors come and build their area to sell their product, but I can guarantee it's probably more linden than I make in 6 weeks of being in France off SL®! Thus, you don't just need capital and land to start your own Fashion Biz on SL®, you also need...classiness and building capabilities. It's not just about making tiny prim necklaces and flexi dresses, you need to be able to build the classiest store to sell your sassy and floofy dresses.

Anyway, we finally built it. Talisman 4.0? The History of Talisman...
Talisman 1.0: Hazel sold flexi dresses from the back of her car club. Sam joins the team
Talisman 2.0: New store built, purple walls. Lili becomes Hazel's sidekick partner and makes clothes under ^V^Omen^V^; Sam brings her b/f Ladi from Holland.
Talisman 3.0: Hazel's next store includes a fountain full of sharks and a bigger catwalk. Sam & Ladi bring more Flying Dutchmen (Keynir and Mijn)
Talisman 4.0: Talisman drops its ghetto exterior and now looks like a classy joint and less like, a Walmart. Now we have a place as classy as Hazel and I. It only took: 3 weeks, uncountable Lindens (cost/loss), chocolate floors, a potential sphinx, firing of incompetants, and a partridge in a pear tree.

Now all I need to do is like, make shit for the store.... yeah...photoshop...here I come?

Identity Issues

So, I don't like when there are people on SL that have screwed you over and then you find them lurking around your home! As if, "you're fired" doesn't get it across that Shit...get out of my Second Life®! There is this one avatar on my Friend's List who I have just been waiting to de-friend...but she's ALWAYS online. And I think it would be a little uncomfortable for me to de-friend her and then have to deal with the iming explaining why I defriended her. It becomes way too much of a hassle and ultimately, she is still on my list. You know I'm not nearly this selective on my AIM list, maybe the whole virtual reality of running into the person in Last Call or at my own skyplat makes me more anxious.

Today I decided to venture outside of my redheadness...and I wasn't just buying hair for my model! No...I bought PINK HAIR! Yes, virtual money from my pocket purchased hair that is not red. Let me tell you it seemed very strange. I think you get used to seeing your avatar a certain way, similar to seeing yourself, and when the avatar suddenly changes...it is just weird. I identify myself so much with being a redhead in RL and SL®..that it's just weird. Luckily, with one click of a button, I am unattached to the pink hair and voila, redhead again!

The only problem was that my friend said I looked like Avril Lavigne. WTF! The other day he said my RL self looks like Gillian Andersen ("The Truth is Out there Scully...") and now my SL pink haired avi looks like that waste of space neo-punk singer. *puke* Surprisingly, as I tried to go to sleep this morning....what did I find on tv? The only thing on TV besides infomercials?? X-Files.

Welcome to Reality..er SL®reality?

So, while driving to work this morning I figured, shite..I should have a blog that is completely distinct and separate from my RL blogs. I wanted something that, if I wanted to put a web address to in my profile...I could...or if I was just in the mood to rant and rave about shit..I can.

The worst part about some of these blog things, is that people will inevitably read them. People love gossip, in Secondlife® in reallife...and on tv! Thus, ultimately this blog will be full of what would be coined "gossip" but what I would perceive as...my fuckin' opinion.

News to report:
Yet again another "woman" on Secondlife® has revealed "herself" to be of a gender unlike my own.. yes...another He-She strikes again! I need to start counting and making a list of who decides to come out in SL®. And I keep on thinking maybe I should do a report on this. What an inquisitive psychological report, or even academic paper it would be to discuss the alternative life styles choices of men living as women on second life. I mean, I want to know why they do it? Most of these men-"women" are probably straight males in relationships, then why the utter delight in living as another gender in SL®? Even worse, not just living as another gender but engaging in feminine behavior and seeking it out! I mean, like becoming a model, buying TONS of female clothes, even escort services? Is it all a ploy to get to know women better? And does it work if probably half the "women" the he-she avatars know are probably also he-she avatars. These are questions I want answers to, damnit.

I guess, life is just boring playing your own gender? wtf.